The final exam in English 7 consist of two examinations – one written discussion essay and one discussion. At the exam you will be given a topic and two articles to read that you shall refer to in your essay. At the discussion you will be given another article on the same topic. The written exam will show your reading comprehension, how well you can write an essay and how well you can refer to articles.
Below you have the assessment matrix that will be used when assessing your essay. You also have a student example of an essay (but it’s not the same topic as you will have).
To practice for the final exam you will write a discussion essay on another topic, which will be assessed, but it is the final one that you write in class that will count.
Assessment Matrix for Final Exam in English 7
| F | E | C | A | |
| Content, instructions, references and register. | Your text is too short to be assessed and/or you haven’t understood the articles.You don’t follow the instructions.
The text is too informal. You don’t refer to any of the articles.
|
You focus too much on only one or two aspects/articles. You show a basic understanding of the articles.You follow the instructions.
You show that you can write in a formal register but you have too much informal language. You have at least two references, but they are not done correctly. |
Your show many aspects of the topic and make good use of the information in the articles.You use a formal register with some exceptions.
You refer to the articles in a fluent and correct way. |
Your text deals with the topic in a nuanced and profound way.
You use exactly the right formal register.
You show great skill in referring to the articles. |
| Structure and coherence | Your text lacks a clear introduction and/or ending.
The lack in coherence and/or paragraphs makes the text hard to read. |
Your text has an introduction and a conclusion.
Your text is fairly coherent with clear paragraphs.
|
Your text has a good introduction and conclusion.Your text is very coherent with linking words that bind the paragraphs together. | Your text has an excellent introduction and conclusion.Your text has a very well-thought through structure with advanced linking words that binds the paragraphs together. |
| Grammar and spelling | Your text contains many grammar and spelling mistakes, some of which are serious. | Your text have some grammar and spelling mistakes but not too serious. | Your grammar and spelling are good with few exceptions. | Your grammar and spelling are almost perfect. |
| Fluency, vocabulary and sentence structure | Your language is simple and clear and has a certain fluency.Your text has only a basic vocabulary and contains errors in the use of words and idiomatic expressions.
Your sentence structure is mostly correct, but simple. |
Your language has a good fluency.
Your text has a good vocabulary.
Your sentence structure is acceptable, but could be more varied and advanced. |
Your language has a very good fluency.
Your text has an advanced vocabulary.
You write with great variation, both in sentence structure and vocabulary. |
Your language has an excellent fluency.
Your text has a very advanced vocabulary that you use with great precision.
You writing is full of elegance, creativity and an excellent variation. |
Discussion Essay
The aim of the discussion essay is to inform the reader about a topic and show different perspectives (sides) of it. You are allowed to express your own opinion but the aim is not to persuade others what to believe.
Guidelines
- The introduction is the first part of the essay. The function is:
- to introduce the subject to the reader in an interesting and catchy way
- to give some background information about the subject
- to state the main idea or focus of the essay
- In the body paragraph make sure you show solid support for the points you make by describing, explaining and illustrating so that the reader will think you are worth “listening to”. Let each paragraph explain or discuss one aspect using specific details and examples to clarify and support your thesis.
- Since you are discussing the topic in your essay, it is important to bring up aspects of the issue from different sides and angles even if you might find yourself leaning towards a particular view as the essay progresses (continues).
- At the end, the conclusion rounds off the essay in one of the following ways:
- By briefly summarizing the main ideas of the essay
- By making recommendations about ideas discussed in the essay
- By suggesting a solution to the problem discussed in the essay
- By offering a personal reflection that grows logically out of the body paragraphs
- References. Indicate all the sources, such as newspapers, magazines, books, Internet pages, from which you have cited facts, ideas or passages. Show them both in the text and in the list of references at the end.
- How to refer to a writer of an article/book etc
In the article ”Why Obesity Abhor” (The Independent, 28 Jan, 2007), Susan MacMillan ….
…says/writes/suggests/demontrates/shows/observes/claims/finds/reports/
discusses/explains/defines/attempts …
List of References (example)
MacMillan, Susan, ”Why Obesity Abhor” ,The Independent, 28 Jan, 2007
http://www.whatissocialnetworking.com/dangersofsocialnetworking23,
21 April, 2010
McClood, Kevin, “The Social network Explosion”, Penguin, 23 April 2010
Linking words
- To express addition, i.e. to say something more on an idea already discussed: besides, moreover (formal), further more (formal), also, too, what’s more, etc.
- To contrast ideas, i.e. to compare two (or more) ideas and point out some kind of difference between them: however, yet, still, although, on the contrary, but, nevertheless (formal).
Example: Jo’s very fond of children, she’s hardworking and reliable. However, she’s got very little experience of children.
- To express the reason for something or the effect of something: because, as, since, for this/that reason, as a result, therefore (formal), consequently (formal)
Example: Since Jo’s a very hardworking and reliable person with a lot of experience of children I think she’d make an excellent au pair.
Phrases to express opinion:
In my opinion, this is/In my view, this is
It seems to me that …
I believe that… /I think that …
What I think is …/As I see it …/The way I see it …
As far as I’m concerned …
My impression of the book/film/play is …
Personally, I think that …/I don’t think that …
Language
- Write with as advanced language as you can (sentence structure and vocabulary).
Example of simple language
”The development of technology will never stop. I don’t think we can stop it. We have to try to solve the problems that it creates”.
Example of advanced language
”Since the development of technology will never cease, we ought to be thinking of ways to restrain it and instead try to solve the problems that technology brings.”
- Use as idiomatic (“English”) language as possible.
- Adopt your language to the task. In most text you want to avoid expressions like “stuff”, “cause” etc. However, it’s often OK to use contractions like “don’t” and “I’d”.
- Think about congruency (“He likes …”, “she doesn’t”)
- Vary your sentence structure. Don’t start every sentence with “I think …”.
- Check your spelling. Practise the words that you find hard to spell.
CHECKPOINTS FOR REVISING
- Have I introduced the subject in an engaging way?
- Have I given necessary background information on the subject?
- Have I finished the introduction with a thesis sentence that clearly shows what the body paragraphs will contain?
- Does each body paragraph deal with a different aspect?
- Have I included enough details and examples in each paragraph to really explain and clarify my point?
- Have I rounded off my essay in an engaging way?
Student example 1 (assessed as A)
The Pros and Cons of Video Surveillance
An insidious flying drone with a X-ray camera or a super sensitive microphone in the sky spying on you might be the reality of the future, at least if you live in Britain. The British government has installed over 4.2 million devices of surveillance all across the country and by doing so creating the most secure and safe society in the western world, some people claim. Meanwhile, others have the opinion of the closely watched, eye-in-the-sky society, to be deprival of the human rights and that it has not been proven to be effective in a crime fighting arena. Furthermore, some even accuse it to be a social suicide and an economically black hole. In the mentioned order I will discuss these different points of view.
The majority of the Britons believe that surveillance of the public areas will allow the streets to become more regulated and crime-free zones. In a survey carried out by The Guardian mentioned in the article “Orwell rolls in his grave: Britain’s endemic surveillance cameras talk back” (May 30, 2007) published by Will Byrne, the opposition of the installation of the CCTV system consists only of a miniscule 2 percent of the population. In the same article Home Secretary John Reid is being interviewed and clearly states that he believes this system to be the most efficient way of ensuring individual security and comfort in a ferocious society. Thus, it is understandable that people in the UK gravitate towards un approving attitude of the surveillance system.
On the other hand, there is a strong divergence and opposition to the acceptance of the governmental surveillance. The most common argument is that it violates the human rights and that the citizens never agreed to be broadcasted in a “big brother” show of surveillance. In the article written by Will Byrne, Bill Bowring, a senior professor of law at the University of London expresses himself in this way; “The present surveillance situation certainly transgresses both the Human Rights Act and the European Convention for Human Rights.” He also stresses the need for a written constitution with entrenched provisions on human rights and civil liberties, believing it to be vital in a undoubtedly upcoming social-deprived society. Others tend to point out the great expenses the CCTV system entails, which have been accounted to a total sum of $500 million since 1994. The ones who economically supports the program are the taxpayers, which of course, many find difficult to swallow.
Furthermore, in the article “Orwell rolls in his grave: Britain’s endemic surveillance cameras talk back” (May 30, 2007), Martin Gill, professor of criminology at the University of Leicester, reports in his study from 2005 that the criminal activities increased rather than decreased in the presence of the cameras. Another study has shown that illumination has a more direct effect of reducing the risk of criminal actions of taking place. Hence, one can feel sympathy for those who believe there to be better and more thrifty methods of simultaneously protecting the society and the personal privacy than the current system.
In response to the foregoing statements, it is clear that people have various ideas how to solve the engaging situation of governmental surveillance. But one thing is certain; we’re all in the same boat, so we better reach a conclusion that is officially accepted by the citizens and is complying with the existing laws of surveillance.
List of references
Byrne, Will, “Orwell rolls in his grave: Britain’s endemic surveillance cameras talk back”, The Raw Story, 30 may, 2007
[Online] Available from: http://rawstory.com/news/2007/Orwell_rolls_in_his_grave_0530.html
Accessed: 23 September 2015
Student example 2 (assessed as E)
Video Surveillance
Did you know that Britain is the most surveillance country in Europe? In Britain there are over 4,2 million CCTV cameras across the country (Byrne, 2007). In this essay we are going to look at pros and cons of video surveillance.
The aim of the CCTV cameras is to prevent crime, terror and illegal immigration but to also help improve the law enforcement and disaster relief. It helps us to keep watch in our homes and business, streets, parks and several other places. Video surveillance can also be distracting and bothersome for some people in the long run, for example it can give anybody the opportunity to find out any information about your personal life that you maybe not want to share with others. The cameras can for instance see trough the clothing, take picture and record sounds etc. (Will Byrne, 2007).
Even if the UK has no such as a written constitution that apply there should be some kind of a law I think. In the article “Home on the rang where the spy drones fly” (2011), Rupert Cornwell reports that US civil liberties group, demanded in a report last week that “hummingbirds” be subject to the same regulation as police wiretaps.
Today many countries have a DNA databank to make police work more effective. With these data banks it’s more likely to find the criminals! You can exclude the guilty and also the innocent person from different samples such as blood, semen, skin, saliva and hair from a case. In this case the police can get hold of that person maybe faster than it would have taken.
However the question is if the increased camera really prevents crime. In an article in the guardian “Orwell rolls in his grave: Britain’s endemic surveillance cameras talk back” (2007), Will Byrne defines that the criminals actually increased after haven put CCTV cameras in 13 community’s.
Can drones make our society safer and protect us from disasters and crimes when it seems to have some error? According to Rupert Cornwell (2011) “Home on the range, where the spy drones fly” the drones seems to be very popular among the police because of the technical feature. With the branch of consumer electronics expand, the technology grows more powerful and user friendly every year, while costs fall. It shows in“ 500 million dollar has been spent since 1994 on the CCTV system alone” (Will Byrne, 2007).
Don’t you think that it has it gone to far? I think it has! To go over the top and don’t give the people non-private space is humiliating and trampling over the human rights.
Mr Smedjeback's English Class 